Reporting From Fifteen Weeks In….There's Light!

It's been nearly four months since the lil' guy showed up and added his own groove to our family circle. He's plump, adorable and active. Big sister is in love with him, as are my husband and I. At this point, we are starting to notice a few things.

#1.  We should have named him Houdini. The dude would not be swaddled without a fight. This kid, in the blurry, early weeks, hated swaddling in the will-fight-for-an-hour, kick legs viciously, wiggle and worm his way to freedom, those blankets will NOT stay around me kind of way. Our first child loved it, loved being wrapped into a burrito of blankets but so far, number two wants to be free, free, free, to wave his hands, chew his fists and stretch out. Most night when I come in to feed him, he's completely unwrapped and happy, happy, happy.

#2.  My baby books were helpful… but I'm not a failure for breaking rank.   I would find myself frantically thumbing through the dog-eared Mommy Guide, the super duper helpful tome to which I dutifully adhered while grooming my little lady for good sleep habits, eating habits etc., etc. Yeah, some of it works this time as well, but some of it doesn't. Some of it just doesn't apply to moms dealing with an active toddler or pre-schooler or just about any age schooler. This time around I'm trying to go with the flow, take it easy and remember no one, no mom, or dad, can do it all or be perfect.

#3.  I had SO much free time when there was only one. Only recently, as he can manage to stay up for a couple of hours and therefore has started taking longer naps, will he sleep for longer than 45 minutes. When kiddo numero uno is also on the scene, forget about it. Going to the bathroom is about all the alone time granted this mama until lights out.

#4. There is enough love for everyone. My heart is so open. The little guy is so great and so much fun already, I'm so excited to watch another fabulous human being discover what this life and this earth has to offer in the way of food, music, color, friends, reading, running, playing, nature and love. While I was pregnant with him, and I know all parents must have these thoughts, I couldn't help thinking, will I feel differently about him? Will I resent the time it takes away from my first child? Will I be so worn out I won't be able to savor the tiny moments that fly by in a flash? No, it turns out, I have time and space for all it of it. The love for your own is incredible!

#5. The second sibling factor. Quite simply, it's crazy wild. I am watching my second baby do nothing but watch his very energetic sister all hours of the day. Granted, I'm pretty sure he's not thrilled when she's about one inch away from his face, nearly screaming at him, "goo, goo, gaaaaa, blah!! WAaaa!!" He's been startled a few times but nevertheless, his eyes are on her, as she whirls, twirls and jumps her way through the day. No joke, the second sibling is learning faster than the first one ever did, he has a perfect example in his big sister.

It's been a fast and furious four months and things are looking up. I've got this thing called motherhood where I want it, and I am so lucky to be able to take a front row seat at the story of my children's lives.

Whadya Know?! Preschool is Pretty Cool!

So the munch started preschool last week and I have to say, why didn't I think of this before?! Well, of course I did, but the kiddo missed the cutoff for several programs following the school rules of needing to be a certain age before Sept 1st last year, then I never got around to enrolling her in the new year and all of a sudden it was summer and we were moving! So here we are heading in to the first of many years of instruction and I'm keeping my fingers crossed. To be honest, this mama was more nervous about preschool than the kiddo, probably because what kid understands the ins and outs of preschool if they've never seen the inside of a school room? I went over and over in my head the possibilities and potential for all-out disaster, everything from the morning trials and tribulations of getting a so-not-a-morning-kid out of bed before 8:30 am to the crying and screaming as attempts were made to pry little arms and legs off my body. From the other kids not wanting to play right on down to her refusal to follow the rules and being left in the land of Time Out forever. Not kidding people, I actually lay awake in the early dawn of the first day worrying about the coming hours. I kept my phone attached to my person like it was sewn on, afraid I was going to miss the call from the school, demanding I pick up this crazy child.

But guess what, and this is no surprise to the veteran mommies out there.....the call never came. The almost pleasant visit to the doctor's office came and went. The hours of quiet in which were filled with quality work time and household organization were extremely fulfilling. The lunch which was eaten without having to get up once was wholeheartedly enjoyed. The kid was returned to me smiling, happy, excited to share her experience, and, after the second day, proudly announced she had napped during quiet time. So this is what it's like! It's a total win-win for everyone. The munchkin gets to be educated, entertained and have a whole day filled instead of being with a mom who is pretty darn good at filling up the time with cool things to do but is in no way SUPERMAMA. The mama gets to get things done during the day instead of in the early dawn or the wee hours of the night. Both get to enjoy afternoons together, catching up after what seems like being apart for decades. Totally awesome.

Now, this peace will be all mine for exactly two more months. After that, the fourth player in this family will be making his opening appearance and that's gonna be a whole new ballgame! It's going to take a whole new set of skills to juggle the times and trials of being a parent to two fabulous little peeps.  I can only imagine the adventures awaiting my full participation and patience. Ummm, how soon do they accept babies into preschool? Just kidding folks, cause if the little guy is to be my last baby in bunting, I'm probably going to be sobbing when his school bell rings.

Mama Finds Her Ommm Spot

Being a full time mama to a very precocious, strong-willed, almost 4 year old girl is pretty awesome. I love her enthusiasm for learning, her excitement about life and her willingness to help. Her determination rocks too....except when said determination is to make her own way of the world, and not in the way I'd like to see things happen. Now, don't get me wrong, I truly appreciate an opinion. I'm from California, remember? And I've lived in San Francisco for over 10 years, so opinionated folks are my homies. Except when the opinion is coming from my child. And it's an opinion or a stuck-in-the-mud-and-not-moving position. That's usually about the time when I say to the hubby, "this is your daughter!"

Since we've moved from San Francisco to Dallas, I feel like the determination to do everything differently than how I would prefer has gotten stronger. Could be simply because she's getting older, getting closer to the ripe old age of 4, thus making her an expert opinion on just about everything, and of course, much more knowledgable than mom. Could be because everything is new, so she's trying to establish herself in a new pad, a new city, a new routine, trying to make new friends. Could be, because secretly she's sitting in bed at night plotting, very Dr. Evil like, "now how do I take my mom to the limits of her patience, test that patience, give up just a smidgen to let her think she's got one on me and then continue to test, heeee heee hee?!" In all honesty, I doubt it's the latter but I'm thinking the former has something in the mix.

Either way, I'm having to find some serious ommm, without being able to enjoy a nice relaxing glass of vino in the evenings. Exercise usually does the trick and just as I had gotten back into a pretty impressive gym habit, considering my size and point of pregnancy, kiddo #2 decided to create some slight strain on the bod, so I've had to cut back in the last week. Hot nights on the town with the gals is a guaranteed stress reliever but my first Mom's night out of the month is tonight and lucky me, I've got one planned for Thursday too.

Writing seems to be a good outlet too, so if you see more and more of these thoughts spilled out, it's lil ol' me, trying to come to terms with being a calm and serene mother, only screaming with my mouth shut, in the bathroom, with the door shut. I'm not saying I make it to the other room every time but I try to remind myself to put my feet in her little shoes, and honestly try to look at her world. It's a pretty controlled environment, and having so little power and control over any situation on any given day would make me a crazy lady too. So I just think over and over again, empathy, empathy, serenity and peace at home. Usually does the trick. But not always.

So that's where the MNO's, the secret stash of chocolate chip cookies, a new recipe combined with a great Pandora station and the killer view of the marina and lake come into play. So far I'm pretty proud of my ability not to lose it every time the kiddo and I have a stand-off, which have come to look  a lot like a scene out of one of the Western flicks her grandpa is so fond of watching.

How do you manage to stay calm in the face of a stand off?? I'd love to hear it!!

Cali Mama on Red Tricycle

Just wanted to share some of my posts from Red Tricycle, where I'm currently writing for the national issue. It's a great guide to having fun with families!!

http://redtri.com/awesome-growth-charts/

http://redtri.com/storage-solutions-for-arts-and-crafts/

http://redtri.com/atlanta/eco-fabulous-skin-care-for-kids/

http://redtri.com/atlanta/diy-indoor-activities/

http://redtri.com/stylish-diaper-bags/


Stay tuned for more great stories!!!

NorCal Mama Settles In...And Starts To Melt

Well, it's been just over a month since we made the BIG move to the BIG D. My experience was rather enjoyable actually, thanks to a First Class ticket for the kiddo and myself. It's a whole new world beyond those curtains I tell ya! Our arrival was smooth, and our transition in becoming pool devotees was pretty quick, although apparently the powers that be really wanted to make me feel welcome in the Lone Star State. News Flash! The month of July '13 in Dallas was one of the coolest in decades. Yeah folks, I'm talking about highs in the 90's with lows in the high 60's, unheard of, according to seasoned Texans. Having grown up in the Sac Valley, I actually dealt with these temps rather well, in fact, was enjoying them, being acclimated to 70's and 80's with lows in the 50's in Marin and the Bay Area. Joined a couple of mother's clubs, started driving everywhere, and realized I still couldn't hit the parks unless it was before noon or after 6pm. It's library fun, pools, water parks, gym class and shade for us, probably until about mid-September.

Now, about this hot weather. I'm sure being the proud owner of a basketball style belly is adding to the heat factor. But it's hot. Super-duper hot. Like it's been in the 100's every day for a week and shows no sign of a cool front, anywhere on the horizon. I've almost been wishing my weakness was kinda like the Wicked Witch of the West, you know, the gal who melts when splashed by a bucket of water? Yeah, I'm thinking about that, a lot. Cause I'm melting without the water. Give me water, give me a pool. Lucky for us, the sweet spot we landed is about 100 feet from a fantastic pool that seems to be open just about all hours of the day. Also lucky for us, the Cullen Clan of Texas are the proud owners of one of the nicest pools in which I've ever spent time, complete with a fabulous view of the lake, not bad at all! So we'll stick to water during the day, hanging at the park at night, finding indoor play spots and just getting used to the weather. I'm sure, or at least, I'm hoping, next year I'll be adjusted and since I won't be sporting the beach ball belly, it will be a little more tolerable.

Till next time, think of a pool and think of me!

Marin Mama....Leaves Marin

I never thought I would ever write a post about leaving Marin County. I've lived here for 11 years, the longest of any place besides where I grew up in central California. I've lived here, loved here, made amazing friends here, raised my 3.5 year old wild child here. It's everything I've ever wanted out of a town, a community, a home pad. Except, how much it costs. Sadly, this paradise is the most expensive strip of land to call home in these United States, second only to New York City. When the hubby and I decided to bring some kiddos into this world, we made the decision one of us would only work part-time, in order to be with our children during the formative years. It's a choice I don't regret in the slightest but it's a sacrifice because we cannot afford to own a home, provide security and enjoy life as a family living here. So when a job offer came up in Dallas, my husband's hometown, we struggled, agonized and probably changed our minds a gazillion times until we finally made the decision to leave CA, head for Dallas and set up shop in his hometown, where his parents and sister with two young kiddos of her own are thriving. We are expanding the brood come November and our small two bedroom flat is already squishy so it seemed like a good time for a little change, or rather, in this case, a huge, gigantic, fantastically large change.

So as I head into my last week living in California, for the next few years anyhow, I am sad, excited, nervous, exhausted and so many other emotions, it's a major roller coaster ride with rather large, stomach losing drops. I can't wait to live near my sis-in-law, who will become my partner in crime. I am so excited to watch my kids grow up with their cousins. I'm thrilled to not have to worry about making the paycheck meet all our financial needs, every single GD month. I'm curious about the Lone Star state, on every visit thus far I've enjoyed myself tremendously. Southern hospitality, it's not a myth people!  On the other hand, I'm sad to be leaving my home state, the best state in the union, the most beautiful place in the world. I'm reeling over leaving the cultural diversity in the Bay Area, something I didn't grow up with but have learned to love, savor and sometimes even take for granted. I'll miss the sounds of the Pacific Ocean and the deep, moist redwood groves. I'll miss the breathtaking spans of the Golden Gate Bridge and the glory that is the bay, something that I, not once, ever tired of viewing. I'll be torn up at the fact I won't be able to drive an hour to my mom's house, or 3 hours to our cabin in Tahoe City, where the crystal clear, icy blue waters await my splash.

I won't be gone forever, there ain't no way someone could keep me out of the Golden State, but now I'll be a visitor rather than a resident, a status I'm still not quite sure I feel comfortable about, or have even accepted. I know I'll be able to appreciate what's before me when I visit, because I'll know what to do, who to visit, where to eat. I know my family and I will look forward to our vacations in California, something millions of people dream about and many never see to fruition. We'll have more cash to enjoy our time here, instead of scraping the barrel to make it work.

And who knows? Maybe we'll be back someday, maybe we won't be able to stay away. It's a special place this California, and it will always be in my heart. But the time has come to put something else first  and I have to say, making this decision with my husband, for the good of our family, is the first real grown up thing I think I've ever done. Putting the fam first, me second, is simply straight up serious adult business, no joke.

So goodbye my sweet state, I will treasure our time together near and dear to my heart. And when I return, I have no doubt you will embrace me with open arms, and whisper a song of joy, which is just so left coast and so very me indeed.

Marin Mama Stops to Smell the Roses

Wanna know what gets me going? Springtime in Marin County. Yup, it's at this time I sit back and really dig in my heels, reaffirming my determination to ensure my family lives and thrives in this absolutely beautiful place. It's really not fair, I mean, to people who don't live near Marin or the Bay Area because the scenery is well, simply breathtaking. It's not just the rolling green hills or the vast amounts of wildflowers seen fluttering in the wind just about everywhere. It's the fresh smells, the creeks flowing, the mist and fog seen hovering around Mt. Tam like a blanket wanting to cover the sleeping lady for a nice afternoon nap. It's seeing my fellow Marinites taking advantage of the sunny but-not-crazy-hot days. We can be found lounging at the parks, walking down our main streets enjoying ice cream, wandering the booths at any number of farmer's markets, kayaking, grabbing a beer at Marin Brewing Company after an awesome bike ride.

I consider it an honor and an absolute privilege to only work weekends and thus be able to wander the county with the kiddo in tow almost every day of the work week, when the trails are empty, the lakes are still and the meadows are pristine.  The little gal loves it too, which is a thrill all in itself. She already talks about the beach and the water with such love that this mama, having grown up in the Sacramento Valley, believes with all her heart that it's oh-so-cool we can pack up the car and hit the sand within 30 or so minutes.

Our little yard is in full bloom. The pink jasmine is about the explode and I never get tired of the scent so strong it wafts down to the lower level of our driveway. The hubby got a head start on the garden planting and the potato tops are sprouting, the strawberries are blooming and all the perennials are popping up and showing their true colors. I can't wait to start picking the fruits of our labor and trying, at least, to get some of it in the house before my daughter eats most of it, fresh, right there in the yard.

Marin Mama Goes Head to Head....With the Righteous Mommy

Okay, this is a little bit of a rant. I'm a pretty laid back mama. Rules are definitely important, as is respect and listening but overall, I'm up for letting kids figure it on their own, sans the hover-style parenting many people seem to find so fashionable these days. For example: leaving your kid in the car for over 60 seconds to run an errand, even if the windows are down....maybe not such a great idea. Walking away from a screaming 3 year old who won't leave the confines of the toy ship at the local children's museum....totally acceptable. I'm talking maybe 50 yards here, with sight of said screamer at all times. Honestly, it was either walk away and hope she follows or rip her out of the ship and carry a kicking, screaming, very unhappy child to the front gate. I opted for the former, because, again, I think it's important to let kids figure some things out on their own. RIGHT?!!

 Well apparently this was very, very wrong for another mom today. She saw the kiddo's face coming from out of the ship window  and made a beeline for the thing. I was already walking back towards the ship because it was very obvious my brilliant plan wasn't working this time round. She looked at me, looked at the screamer, looked at me again and kept walking. I called out "It's okay, she's mine, it's totally fine" and I got the most distasteful-you-are-an-awful parent look, one of the worst I've seen in some time.

I almost laughed because it really was funny. There was absolutely no chance of anything happening. The place was closing and no one was there, just me, the screamer and this worry wort of a parent who clearly thinks I'm going about child rearing the total wrong way.

Being overly sensitive? Perhaps. But really!? I can't get 50 yards away with kid in sight without being frowned upon? What's next? If I let my kid climb the ladder to the "Big Kid" slide, am I totally irresponsible? Sorry, I'm just of the school of common sense. I mean, kids have been around for how long and are pretty resilient, in my opinion. Especially if she's got me watching from the sidelines.

Marin Mama Stays Calm....Even During the Storms

I've learned that my precocious daughter is huge a tantrum thrower. Now, on authority from this mama's own mama, I too, was a thrower of the mighty storm. I'm talking on the ground, red faced, drama queen style screaming. And lucky me, (and too my mother's delight) I am raising a fantastically smart, stubborn and opinionated little girl. Seriously, I do feel quite lucky. Even when she's on the ground, about 25 yards behind me in the mall, screaming for all the world to hear. Because I know this strength and feeling she has about, oh say, riding the rides when I don't have any quarters, will help her succeed in the future. Because she'll never take it sitting down. Because she'll fight for what she wants, because she'll refuse to give up. Doesn't every mother hope for that kind of determination and strength in a child? Even if it means you feel like you might be going insane at this very moment? Or even if you get those knowing looks and smiles from those who've tread the path before you?

My answer is yes. I'm willing to deal with the drama now, because I know my kiddo won't just sit back and watch her life pass by. Nope, this one is hopping on the happening train and taking over for the conductor!!  At this point, I just need to ride out the tantrum and feel confident that these exhausting moments will come back and give her a little kick in the behind.

And when she has a daughter of her own, I'll be able to look back and feel just as proud of her as my mother feels of me.

Marin Mama Stays Busy

I've been very very busy these last few months, so busy that I haven't had much time here. I am very proud of the leaps and bounds I've been making in my writing career and I've had a lot of fun writing for some local sites. Here are some links to recent articles I've written:

Business Spotlight: Marin Kids Consignment

Business Spotlight: Viva Diva

Business Spotlight: A Child's Delight

Interview with Susan Z

Moms On Trend

Independent Bookstores Perfect for Kids

Put Away the Piggy Bank - Marin on $10 or less a day

Marine Life at your Fingertips

Reduce, Reuse, Go Shopping

Travel to Hungary without Leaving the Bay Area

Marin Mama Races her Tot....And Loses!

Okay, so I realize it's important to encourage our children, especially when they are doing something wonderful, healthy, important or amazing. But what if said child is doing this amazing activity in a place that is TOTALLY not the right spot to be practicing these awesome skills? Do you reprimand or encourage? Do you let your kiddo run wild because they have a keen sense of direction? Do you hope that your marathon runner might make it back over to you? Do you let your kid swim off into the sunset? How does one balance the props for skills and the desire to keep a child within arm's reach, which, at any age before ???? is the best option.

Let me elaborate. My daughter has recently discovered she prefers to be on her feet while we run errands to any store, more specifically, the mother of stores, you know the one to which I refer....Target. Oh Targjayy, how we love you. We love the "One Spot" we love the walls of candy, we love the aisles in which we run, at full speed. Wait....back up, no, my daughter loves the aisles at which she runs full speed.

I on the other hand, after having a serious heart to heart with a 2.5 year old with her own opinions, do not love the aisles. They have corners and my kid runs too fast for me to maneuver the stupid cart I thought I needed. I can hear her pitter patter down the main center aisle, I can hear here saying "Mommy I run fast!" There is such enthusiasm in her voice it almost makes me feel guilty to run after her, huffing and puffing, cart abandoned, sweep her up and literally force her into the cart seat. I gotta get stuff done! Kiddo, we are not training for a marathon at the local TARGET!!!

After that, our trip isn't so much fun. But the child just runs TOO FAST!! And she's TOO CUTE, and people look at me weird when she's running away, nearly 20 yards ahead of me. Hopefully as time continues, she'll enjoy browsing at the slow pace I used to enjoy. When she was about 2 weeks old. And asleep the entire trip.

Marin Mama List of Faves...For Herself

View this list »

Marin Mama Hears Real Words....With Real Meaning!

My kiddo has been off the charts awesome on the child sign language hoopla. We got some videos as a gift and man, did they work! The kid had like 40 or 50 signs down in 4 months, something crazy! We were so proud and truly, it did lessen the level of frustration a non-verbal toddler might have from the simple lack of communication tools. I was very happy and excited. Until I thought (first child syndrome here) it might be time for her lovely little voice to make an appearance. I KNEW she knew how to say the words, but signing was easier, and more comfortable. I wasn't mad at all, no, in fact, more of the opposite, because I loved how she could just feel good about communication. But I really wanted her to talk. I wanted to hear her count to ten or show me colors or say her friends' name.

Eventually I just took a deep breath and said to myself, "mama, she's talking just not verbally, chill out man, it will happen." So we chilled out...and waited and remained supportive. Then, about two months ago, even one month ago, someone must have loosened her tongue or given her the magic potion to unlock speech because this kiddo will NOT STOP TALKING! She's so excited about being able to say exactly what she means, express her feelings, tell me about her day, tell her dad about her day, talk to her friends during playtime, talk to her Nana and Baba and Mimi during FaceTime, the words just keep pouring out.

Everyday she gets better! Two syllables today, heck, four tomorrow! Three word sentences today, oh yeah? 5 word sentences tomorrow! The amount of confidence and vibrancy speech gives to my tot is so special and so precious and so much fun to witness. For a few weeks it was 10 new words everyday and what a joy to hear them coming from the little creature who only 2 short years ago was spitting up on my shoulder. What a trip. Such an adventure. So much fun.

My New List on Skinny Scoop

Books My Kiddo Loves: From one bookworm raising another, here are some of our favorite books to read.

Books My Kiddo Loves

Marin Mama Faces no Man's Land: In between the Toilet and the Diapers

***Post Disclaimer: This one if full of poop and pee, those of you with an aversion to potty humor quit reading now.****


Okay, I knew potty training would be something of a serious matter. So serious in fact, I was and am determined not to rush this delicate process. We use cloth diapers at home and corn starch diapers out in the field so I'm not thinking about what diapers cost or the danger to the environment. I'm also OK with my daughter not being ready to move from diapers to the toilet. She's had a little green potty chair for over 6 months and the only thing she does with it is use the bottom half as a stool while brushing her little teeth. Every time in the last few months when I asked her if she wanted to give the thing a test run the answer was "no." So totally not ready to play the potty game. Then again, for a while there her answer to EVERYTHING was "no," probably because she liked the way it sounds and she enjoys the reaction mom gives her after hearing the world 500,000 times in one day.

So I quit asking.  For a while. However, in recent weeks I've observed her observing that sometimes, whoops all of a sudden, "Gee, I'm carrying a load in my pants."  It's kind of funny to watch a child go from unaware of bodily functions to extremely aware and better yet, exceedingly helpful when attempting to rid herself of said load. It's also interesting to hear her offer up helpful information like, "Mommy, poop, bobo!" translation: Mom, there's is something in my pants, it came from my bottom. 


As much as I appreciate her helpful hints, I'm not what you'd call thrilled when seeing her fingers full of you-know-what, after she's shoved her hand down her pants to figure out what just happened. Lucky for me she's quick to let me know what treasure has been literally dug up. I'm also not super excited to see that while napping she's stripped her self down and peed all over her sheets. Truth be told, sometimes she takes the diaper off and then pees on the sheets. Or maybe that was only when she was bummed to be in her crib when she wasn't ready to take a nap.

 It's all part of the learning process and I think it's great that she's becoming award of her humanly function all on her own. I'll admit the clean up can be frustrating, extreme patience will be necessary when she actually begins training and it's really hard not to laugh when your kid shows you a handful of poop but all in all, I think she'll get it down in no time. Maybe not 3 days, but hey, who's counting?

The Marin County Kiddie Corner

The Kiddie Corner: Marin County

Halloween with a 2 year old.....More Fun Than a Bag of Tricks

Last night was the first time Halloween meant something to my toddler. Once she figured out that the costume I gave her and the bucket she was carrying meant that people would give her candy, oh, she had it down pat. So well in fact, at one stop she walked right in to the living room and saw what she could see. No problemwhatsoeverthanksyouverymuch she seemed to say. Even when she took a dive in the street and her candy stash went flying, she didn't cry as much as one tear. She was probably too jacked up from all the sugar, to be honest, but we didn't care, it's one night a year.

We ruled the streets with a great group of parents and kids, all under the age of 5. The local neighborhood is amazing and generous, these kids got enough candy to last them quite a while. With the loving help of the parents, of course. It's been decided our kiddo will be allowed to eat some of her lovingly collected chocolate bars, but only one every other day or so. Her enjoyment will be stretched out into a few weeks and Mom has her emergency chocolate sorted out too.

This year, I really realized Halloween truly is the most fun for the children. Seeing them dressed up, the older kids excited about their costume selection, the screaming, the spooks, the treats. As an adult I would go to the required costume party every year but I've had more fun these last two years trick or treating than any year, at any Halloween bash. It's just so precious to see my baby girl make her way to the front of the pack to get her reward. She wasn't scared of anything, nope, not even the screaming banshees. Every year is going to get better, I think, as she is able to talk more and share her first time experiences, that will take me back to my own youth. So bring on the goblins and witches and ghosts, next year we'll be waiting and ready!

Marin Mama Tries to Unplug...And Fails

There is a reason why this is my first post in over two months. Simply, my workload has been over the top overwhelming. Although I love my job in media relations, it's been a challenging couple of months. Not to mention that the kiddo turned two and we had a blast at the party, complete with a bubble machine and cookie decorating. Needless to say, I was BUSY! But now the craziness has returned to it's level of normalcy, after all, my house wouldn't be my house without some sort of crazy talk,  and I'm finding myself...well, a little sad. I know what you must be thinking, "she was talking about how stressed she was, she was talking about never working in this field again," and true, I said and felt those emotions. Of course, that was when none of my editors or journalists were responding to my pitches. Once the press coverage started coming in, I was feeling great, awesome in fact!

So now, the month of birthdays has passed, the baby showers have passed, the event planning has passed,  and I'm still plugged in to my computer, my iPhone, waiting for the latest update to hit the wires. It could be that I just don't know how to relax! These days, being connected is everything and to really be "connected" and remember I'm talking about electronic connections, not real life connections, you have to constantly be on the update and I mean that in the most literal sense of the word. I realize that this is my job, especially since public relations has come to mean social online relations in a large part, but sometimes I wonder if I could go a day without any electronics. I'd like to think so but it's hard. I've made a note to leave my phone in the car while the kiddo and I are at the park or on the hiking trail. Those precious hours can't be done over and I should make an effort to keep the networking and the updating confined to a few hours a day, preferably when I'm working for the few moments a day when the nap is in full force.

Living in this fast paced society, especially the Bay Area, has taken it's toll on this Marin Mama. The sense of needing to do something, "Quick, check-in, connect, update!" can get out of control and it's time I slow it down a little. This weather won't stay nice for too much longer and then I'll be desperate for entertainment which doesn't include a TV.

Marin Mama Contemplates Clothing...Is it All That Important?

I've been told by that upon receiving my first pair of black patent leather shoes I insisted in wearing them everywhere, even to bed. Apparently I would have my mother sit them right alongside the bathtub so as soon as I was toweling off, those shoes could go right back on my feet. My youngest sister was on the opposite spectrum, not wanting to wear clothes at all, in fact, the less of them the better. My husband is very particular about his shoes and the way they fit. So, should it even be a surprise to me in the last couple of weeks I've been battling the battle which has no end? The Clothing Battle. Yes parents you know exactly what I'm referring to here, don't try to deny it. The struggle that sounds something like "do you really want to wear fur lined boots in July? Don't you think you'll be cold running errands in a swim suit today, considering that it's December? Do you realize that you've got two different shoes on darling?" It can go on for hours, months or even years. 

My kid just started getting weird about clothing and I chalk it up to a week in Dallas, where everyone is practically naked during the summer anyways, and to my family living in a moderate climate where a winter coat is almost never necessary. I tried reasoning with her to put on socks and shoes and a shirt the other day but then I realized two things; 1. Why am I reasoning with a 22 month old toddler who says NO to everything I ask anyways? and 2. Does it really matter if she runs errands with no shirt on? Isn't that considered the norm in Europe? 

To answer my own questions, I don't know why I would try to reason with someone who doesn't really understand the concept, unless of course, she was headed out in a snow storm with her bathrobe on. And second, No, it doesn't matter if she runs errands with no shirt on, in fact, it might make my trip more pleasurable. She's happy, I'm happy she's happy, no one is in danger, we have success!! It's these small battles we as parents ought to let the kids win. Their choices are so limited and really boil down to what they are allowed to do and not to do. To quote one woman who commented on my daughter with a smile "Might as well let her do it while she can" which is very wise because sooner than later she'll be worried about the latest styles and what her friends and idols are wearing. I should be thrilled that this means nothing to her as of yet, that she couldn't care less how she looks to others. I can only hope that some aspect of that carries through her life, creating a confident woman who looks great but doesn't need to worry about looking perfect. It's definitely not worth losing 30 minutes of our day over. In fact, she practically ran out the door in joy the day she wore nothing but a pair of leggings. To her, she was dressed exactly as she wanted and was happy the way she was. 

Marin Mama Follows the Crumbs on the Quest for Clean

I've always been somewhat tidy, in fact, I'd call myself an organized, clean person. I thought this to be a great asset until my first born (and only so far) became a hungry, busy toddler. Now that I'm a parent, I've realized being a clean person sort of morphs into one of two things after the birth of children. A parent either gives up the quest for clean as a lost cause and no longer follows the crumbs or a parent takes on the quest for clean wholeheartedly, as if following the crumbs will prevent more crumbs from falling. Well I am of the latter group and just can't seem to give up on the quest completely. A clean house is something of an achievement, especially to those parents who work full time AND parent. I work part-time and am the CEO of my household. I like my lists made and my laundry folded. I like a shiny clean sink and it's a little sick how excited I get upon seeing how much dirt I manage to vacuum out of the three tiny rooms over which I reside as Queen of Clean.

This used to be a lot easier. The kiddo was messy but it was a moderate mess. Totally manageable and not without reason. Alas, this is no longer. I follow the crumbs on the quest for clean because my 22 month old daughter seems to have taken a liking to throwing almost any type of food on the ground. Carpet, linoleum, tile, no matter, she'll throw food on any surface available. The trail of cheerios can be found from the kitchen to the living room and into her tiny bedroom. The goldfish crackers can be found under the kitchen island, near the TV and even in the bathtub, where my precocious young thing has been testing out her theory of whether or not those things can actually swim. It’s like she’s Sir Isaac Newton having just discovered the law of gravity and can’t stop throwing things down. “Oh Wow! Those peas and tomatoes really DO drop to the ground and roll away under the refrigerator....Hmmmm, avocado and cheese sticks don’t really bounce, in fact, they stick to the ground nicely.” It’s amazing that she’s discovering the laws of science but it messes with my quest for clean!

I can only imagine what a second child does to mamas following the crumbs. Could be that the mess just gets bigger and still gets cleaned up. Could be that the mess overtakes the quest and it’s forced to take a back seat to the quest for sanity. I’ll have to get back to you on that one...maybe you can tell me!?